Birthday time is an exciting time for me. I love celebrating the lives of my family. My oldest's birthday is the day before mine, and my husband's is just five days after my birthday. The sight of my kids bouncing up and down with giant smiles on their faces when they see all the food, decorations, and birthday cake that I spent days on (literally, days. I go all out on their cakes and everything. Cake decorating is actually one of my hobbies) is worth all the labor.
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| Those pink things were meringue cookies that were supposed to look like shrimp. We had rainbow coconut boba tea, rainbow fortune cookies, Hello Kitty snack cakes, homemade crab wontons, pot stickers, and so much more. The top tier was a "kawaii" sushi roll. Her outfit even matched the cake- a fun tradition of mine. |
My daughter will be four in two months, and my son will be three just three months after her birthday. Now that the kids are reaching preschool age together, I figured it was time to change things up a bit, and make it so birthdays can be more than just fun, but also valuable in the long run.
Step 1: Change the gifts around.
The fact that the kids are entering schooling age was a big wake-up call to me. The fact is, if we were putting them in public school, we would be enrolling them in preschool this year. This encouraged me to look up resource material, projects, DIY kits, etc... and I found so much out there! I created a huge wish list on Amazon specifically for homeschool items- books, craft supplies, science kits, even mini excavation kits! There were so many things I wanted to do with the kids, there was just no way I could afford it all. So, I made a request to family. I asked them to please purchase gifts for them from the list for birthdays and holidays instead of sending out dolls and clothes. To be honest, those two don't really play with toys much anyway, with the exception of a few favorites. Toys that could teach them new skills, or enhance what skills they already had, would be far more beneficial and enjoyable to them. My son, while only 2 1/2, is actually very good at playing ball (when he focuses as opposed to running around everywhere). He plays ball every single day, and has great aim and coordination. I took the liberty of buying him a toddler T-ball set for his birthday while it was on sale (yes, five months early, but it was on sale!), and I put a basketball hoop on the wishlist. For my daughter, who adores books, I made note of which ones taught about her favorite things. This way, they aren't getting anymore dolls, purses, or electronic toys they use once or twice and never touch again. The kids get something valuable and rewarding instead- money well spent.
Note: Amazon wishlists have the options to add notes to the individual items and set a priority to them. I marked different items with priorities from low to highest, and made note of which ones would make the best gifts for the kids.
Step 2: Choose a fitting theme.
Let me say first, if your child is dead set on a Spongebob cake (like mine is) or some other party theme based on a not-so-educational show, there is no shame in giving them what they want. The trick is to find ways of making it still something to learn from. My little Luna, while really looking forward to her own Spongebob party, does really love everything about fish. That includes eating fish, and learning about fish. Spongebob is a total guilty pleasure for me, not gonna lie, but I will say it isn't exactly meant to enlighten anyone. As a compromise, she's getting mostly an ocean themed party with bits of Spongebob thrown in. I ordered some little character figurines to put on her cake, and she is very satisfied. My son is another story. Last year, we went with a farm theme and made the cake a chicken on a nest (chickens were his favorite animal). This year is proving a bit tricky. He doesn't really have many "favorite" anythings. He has favorite colors and a couple favorite toys, and he has a shoe obsession. Otherwise, he just has a bunch of things he likes, but not much he is obsessed with. Because I was so badly stumped, I showed him photos of different cakes representing his favorite things. His favorite ones had lots of yellow and other warm colors, circles, and cutesy dinosaurs; particularly "Dinosaur Train" characters. That show teaches kids things, dinosaurs are educational, I can roll with that. He also really likes crayons and colors a lot, and art is certainly an educational subject, so I may go with that instead. He is still learning to speak fluently, so he can't really tell me exactly what he wants just yet, but we have time to figure it out.
So, short version, if they have a subject they like, go with that. If they want a theme that isn't educational, find ways to make that theme into something educational.
Step 3: Choose activities.
Obviously, this will depend on how many kids are coming and how old they are, but there are different crafts and games you can do to go with the theme. We tend to keep our parties to just family, but we still find fun things for Luna and Fox to do with us. Making masks or puppets, playing games, having scavenger hunts, coloring, and even movies are all perfect options. If you are willing to make an investment into a new board game, try out Telestrations, Monopoly in a matching theme (you can find a Monopoly game for just about anything, including Monopoly: National Parks Edition
, and off brands like Dino-Opoly Monopoly Board Game
and even Ocean-Opoly Monopoly Board Game,
but you may want to play the simplified versions with kids) or a Trivial Pursuit game that is easy enough for kids. Set up a scavenger hunt that allows kids to guess the correct answers to receive a clue as to where the next prize is. Print out coloring pages from the internet of different animals, places, people, and more. You can even add facts to the pages before you print them. Make simple salt dough clay and paints for a hands on experience. Just be prepared for a bit of a mess!
If it's within budget, you can also look into having the party somewhere educational, like a museum, zoo, or aquarium. If not, you can always just take the birthday child, or do that in a couple days after you have all recuperated from the party!
Of course, you probably know by now that if it's teens we are talking about, they probably already know what they want to do for their birthday. The first thing I looked for in my teen years was concerts around my birthday.
Step 4: Get your birthday child involved.
There are several ways of going about this. Some parents actually give their kids a set budget and allow them to pick out everything involved in the party, even their own gifts! This allows them to understand budgeting and the value of money. Some parents would rather their kids not know how much they spend on their gifts, or they just want to keep it a surprise, which is totally fine. My kids don't really understand the concept of money at all yet. Currently, Fox thinks all coins are nickles, and Luna doesn't really ask for many things, so I don't really have to tell her if we can afford something or not. In the future, I think I will give a budget for them to work with, and to be honest, that can really teach them not only the value of money and labor, but also how to be creative on a budget, and build new skills. Instead of buying a pinata, which can run between $16 and $35 depending on the size, build one together out of paper mache, or even just paint a thin box. You can also teach them how to price match and compare your options. What costs $5 at one store may cost $3 at another. Although one option looks prettier, it is twice as much, so the better decision my be to sacrifice a bit of visual appeal for a better value, which may also be used on something else.
Some take this a completely different, more intense route. Some have their kids fully pay for their party, with the exception of gifts. If the child wants to rent a room at the aquarium, hire a princess, decorate the rooms with fancy cutouts, or have an extravagant cake, you can encourage them to earn the money for these things themselves. This can prove difficult for young children, so an alternative is to set up a chore chart. Taking out the trash every day and doing the dishes earns an extra $5 to spend on decorations, for instance. An option for kids too young to get a job is to have them do volunteer work somewhere in exchange for another party service. You can also have a middle ground and tell them you can spend X on gifts and part of the party, but if they want extra, they have to earn money to pay for it. Either way, they are learning the value of labor and budgeting. All this proves more and more doable as they get older, and more beneficial. Teens will soon be going to college, getting jobs, and living on their own, so it's vital they learn these skills soon. Either method will help them learn.
If they are old enough, allow them to design and help decorate their cake (unless they enjoy the surprise factor). Luna has been having lots of fun picking out the designs and colors on her cake! She has changed her mind a couple times, but she has kept the same elements of Spongebob and lots of blue and purple. You can also let them experiment with the flavor combinations. Cake doesn't have to be just chocolate or vanilla. If it's too weird of a flavor, you can take the time to try out a recipe together. You might be surprised! That's how I ended up with a surprisingly delicious recipe for black tea cake and honey buttercream. Alternate methods to cake decorating are letting them play with fondant and make their own sculptures (marshmallow fondant, while messy to make, only costs a couple bucks and about 15 minutes, other than setting time). This may inspire a new marketable hobby. You can also simply cover the cake in white fondant, purchase edible markers or make edible paints with pure lemon juice or vanilla extract and food colors of your choice, and let them doodle and paint away on the cake. That can also be a very cute project for smaller parties, since the kids can sign it and decorate it together, and take a photo!
Not only can you get them involved with the cake, but you can get them involved with the snacks, meals, and drinks. Allow them to research what kind of foods can coordinate with their birthday theme (fish and fruits for underwater or pirate themes, Japanese food for ninjas, salads and drumsticks for dinosaur parties, etc). Let them create a menu, and if you choose to, budget the costs with them based on how many you need to serve. Let them help cook and prep.
Another thing you can do is help them design and make their own invitations and thank you notes. This inspires creativity and encourages good manners. You can do this together on the computer, with craft supplies, or even simply hand drawn. Any age can do this. They do not have to be perfect, just have fun with it!
Now, remember, nothing has to be over the top. I go all out with the cake because it is my hobby, then I throw in a few cute decorations and yummy food (the kids have three local young adult/late teen uncles, so plenty of good food is a must!), and I do like to take them somewhere fun and educational, too. Last year, we took Luna to the zoo on her birthday. This year, we may take her to the aquarium a couple days before. We do not invite a bunch of kids, though. We keep it to immediate family. Decorations are usually just a simple Happy Birthday banner and some balloons, a cute tablecloth, and matching plates. Do not stress yourself out making trying to make it all perfect. Please take note, I do not necessarily suggest you make them do everything. After all, their birthday is also a day for them to have fun! Perhaps consider splitting duties, or do them all together. That is, however, ultimately your call. You know your child better than I do! Just remember to make it enjoyable for them. That's the most important part.
Do you have ideas or traditions your family does for birthday parties?
, and off brands like Dino-Opoly Monopoly Board Game
and even Ocean-Opoly Monopoly Board Game, but you may want to play the simplified versions with kids) or a Trivial Pursuit game that is easy enough for kids. Set up a scavenger hunt that allows kids to guess the correct answers to receive a clue as to where the next prize is. Print out coloring pages from the internet of different animals, places, people, and more. You can even add facts to the pages before you print them. Make simple salt dough clay and paints for a hands on experience. Just be prepared for a bit of a mess!If it's within budget, you can also look into having the party somewhere educational, like a museum, zoo, or aquarium. If not, you can always just take the birthday child, or do that in a couple days after you have all recuperated from the party!
Of course, you probably know by now that if it's teens we are talking about, they probably already know what they want to do for their birthday. The first thing I looked for in my teen years was concerts around my birthday.
Step 4: Get your birthday child involved.
There are several ways of going about this. Some parents actually give their kids a set budget and allow them to pick out everything involved in the party, even their own gifts! This allows them to understand budgeting and the value of money. Some parents would rather their kids not know how much they spend on their gifts, or they just want to keep it a surprise, which is totally fine. My kids don't really understand the concept of money at all yet. Currently, Fox thinks all coins are nickles, and Luna doesn't really ask for many things, so I don't really have to tell her if we can afford something or not. In the future, I think I will give a budget for them to work with, and to be honest, that can really teach them not only the value of money and labor, but also how to be creative on a budget, and build new skills. Instead of buying a pinata, which can run between $16 and $35 depending on the size, build one together out of paper mache, or even just paint a thin box. You can also teach them how to price match and compare your options. What costs $5 at one store may cost $3 at another. Although one option looks prettier, it is twice as much, so the better decision my be to sacrifice a bit of visual appeal for a better value, which may also be used on something else.
Some take this a completely different, more intense route. Some have their kids fully pay for their party, with the exception of gifts. If the child wants to rent a room at the aquarium, hire a princess, decorate the rooms with fancy cutouts, or have an extravagant cake, you can encourage them to earn the money for these things themselves. This can prove difficult for young children, so an alternative is to set up a chore chart. Taking out the trash every day and doing the dishes earns an extra $5 to spend on decorations, for instance. An option for kids too young to get a job is to have them do volunteer work somewhere in exchange for another party service. You can also have a middle ground and tell them you can spend X on gifts and part of the party, but if they want extra, they have to earn money to pay for it. Either way, they are learning the value of labor and budgeting. All this proves more and more doable as they get older, and more beneficial. Teens will soon be going to college, getting jobs, and living on their own, so it's vital they learn these skills soon. Either method will help them learn.
If they are old enough, allow them to design and help decorate their cake (unless they enjoy the surprise factor). Luna has been having lots of fun picking out the designs and colors on her cake! She has changed her mind a couple times, but she has kept the same elements of Spongebob and lots of blue and purple. You can also let them experiment with the flavor combinations. Cake doesn't have to be just chocolate or vanilla. If it's too weird of a flavor, you can take the time to try out a recipe together. You might be surprised! That's how I ended up with a surprisingly delicious recipe for black tea cake and honey buttercream. Alternate methods to cake decorating are letting them play with fondant and make their own sculptures (marshmallow fondant, while messy to make, only costs a couple bucks and about 15 minutes, other than setting time). This may inspire a new marketable hobby. You can also simply cover the cake in white fondant, purchase edible markers or make edible paints with pure lemon juice or vanilla extract and food colors of your choice, and let them doodle and paint away on the cake. That can also be a very cute project for smaller parties, since the kids can sign it and decorate it together, and take a photo!
Not only can you get them involved with the cake, but you can get them involved with the snacks, meals, and drinks. Allow them to research what kind of foods can coordinate with their birthday theme (fish and fruits for underwater or pirate themes, Japanese food for ninjas, salads and drumsticks for dinosaur parties, etc). Let them create a menu, and if you choose to, budget the costs with them based on how many you need to serve. Let them help cook and prep.
Another thing you can do is help them design and make their own invitations and thank you notes. This inspires creativity and encourages good manners. You can do this together on the computer, with craft supplies, or even simply hand drawn. Any age can do this. They do not have to be perfect, just have fun with it!
Now, remember, nothing has to be over the top. I go all out with the cake because it is my hobby, then I throw in a few cute decorations and yummy food (the kids have three local young adult/late teen uncles, so plenty of good food is a must!), and I do like to take them somewhere fun and educational, too. Last year, we took Luna to the zoo on her birthday. This year, we may take her to the aquarium a couple days before. We do not invite a bunch of kids, though. We keep it to immediate family. Decorations are usually just a simple Happy Birthday banner and some balloons, a cute tablecloth, and matching plates. Do not stress yourself out making trying to make it all perfect. Please take note, I do not necessarily suggest you make them do everything. After all, their birthday is also a day for them to have fun! Perhaps consider splitting duties, or do them all together. That is, however, ultimately your call. You know your child better than I do! Just remember to make it enjoyable for them. That's the most important part.
Do you have ideas or traditions your family does for birthday parties?
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